Merry Christmunch

As you can see, I'm viting the goofy curly monsters for the holidays.

[see above for curly dog]

I supervised very closely as the people made gingerbread houses.

And believe you me, I will eat it. I need to get some strategy together first for this gingerbread-heist. Does anyone have a copy of Ocean's 11 I can borrow? I know, I'll just call these guys.

Better luck next time :(

I got to this goodness just a *hair* too late. I really wanted to repeat my past Pop Tart glory. I'll get 'em next time. You'll see.

Trash

That is what you get for being too lazy to take the bag to the dumpster.

Trash bag on porch: I eated it.

Family

I obscured my mom's identity because I haven't actually told my people about my online life. But, as you can see, she is pretty happy right now.

Garlandelicious

Cat in pine-y garland: I'd eat it.

Cat near pine-y garland: I'd eat it.

Though, to be fair, I'm so hungry I'd probably eat the blanket they're sitting on...

Low calorie haiku

Gatorade too sweet

Eat Propel Fitness Water

I'm such a bad dog

Breakfast Choice

Guess which two I did not get to eat.

If only I could get my paws on some gravyaccino.

More burn victim

The kitty is still here. He's been distracting that doofus, Spaghetti Batman, which a huge bonus for me and the rest of my posse.

But I can't always have peace and quiet. He's not so bad.

I'd eat him.

Glad to eat it for you

Re: the baking soda

Revenge is dish best served in little plastic cups, jerks.

Arm and Hammer and a bitter flavor

It should be of no surprise to you that my people occasionally set traps for me. Classic anti-dog behavior on their part. Stupid baking soda.

Jimmy Johns is my middle name

I so ate it.

Compassion, I guess

My people have added another critter to their charge.

This little guy was burned in a house fire and lost the rest of his family. I guess since I came from a shelter, it's ok if they look after this guy until he's big enough to be adopted. That doesn't mean have to like him though. Look at his burned little face. His whiskers were fried off!

Fluffff

So kind of the stinky man to share his treats with me.

Marshmellow fluff: I'd eat it.

So glad Mom is back

Single serving lemonde packets: I'd eat it.

In which I am mistreated

I have had very little naughtiness in the past few weeks. Mom abandoned me and left we the stinky man. He obviously has no idea what the protocol for feeding me is; there were no treats on the counter for two weeks! I was wasting away. When Mom finally returned, she even said I looked "skinnier". Skinnier? OUTRAGEOUS! I looked sickly, gaunt, and very scrawny. I can't believe she didn't punish him for neglecting my needs so. But, all was not lost....

Due to their extreme laziness, Mom and the stinky man brought home Chinese food. With the return of Mom came the return of Mom's caring nature. She left the fortune cookies on the counter just like she knows she is supposed to.

Notice that I took care to unwrap the treat. Further notice that I ate the fortune.

Haha

Stupid cat.

Gummi Worms

Num. I has a worm. Several in fact. In belly.

Trash and Tragedy

It was supposed to be epic. They emptied the garbage and left the full bag on the floor in the kitchen: JACK...wait for it.....POT.

I started off with a little bit of shredded cheese bag.

Then I made a serious error. In my hurry to enjoy the rest of the bag's contents, I edged it over the threshold to the basement stairs. Look at the bag mocking my pain.

I wish I had the courage to go to the basement, but I'm too afwaid of that place.

Spaghetti Batman

My people got a stupid new kitty. His name is Spaghetti Batman. He is stupid. I was napping peacfully when his smallness hopped up and ruined my couch. Stupid Spaghetti Batman.

At least he is ruining Tiny Whiney's couch, too.

Creation Museum

So, apparently there are people who think this Noah's Ark thing actually happened. First of all, I'm a dog and even I realize that is redonkulous. Secondly, if it were real, this photo that my people took at the creation museum in Kentucky shows you exactly why I want my next vacation to be on a big boat full of animals.

Oil Fail

My people made popcorn. I think it was supposed to be for me, but they didn't give me any. It's ok though, I got some popcorn for myself. Mine wasn't cooked though, so I had to eat it raw with the oil on the side. And by on the side, I mean on the rug.

More like Tasty Horton's

The lady person brought donuts for her peers in vet school. I decided that I would get to keep the leftovers for myself. I am peerless in my love of donuts.